This is my last post.

I know I haven’t posted in a long ass time anyway, but this makes it official. I wanted to send a cyber goodbye to anybody who actually reads this crappy thing.

If any of you want to contact me, (Stacy, PK) please do, but I will not be checking this blog.

My e-mail is taylorsprings15@yahoo.com and I will give you further contact information if you try to contact me through there. I will not be checking Tumblr messages regularly, I may pop in once a month or so in case there is somthing urgent, but I haven’t a clue what couldn’t be e-mailed directly to me.

Thank you for following/reading/hating this blog and no, I will not be back.

If anything, I may start a new blog in the future, but I am not posting here anymore. This blog didn’t turn out the way I thought it would and it definitely isn’t anonymous anymore, which I think is a big part of why I am leaving it, but I will deal.

I must add, I am so much healthier than I was when I started this blog. Even if my mind is the same, my coping skills have gone from mostly bad, to mostly good. And THAT is very good. Even if I do say so myself.

Farewell, my faithful readers, and I’m sorry I bored you to death with constant tales of my trial and failure, but it was almost kind of fun talking to myself.

Merry Christmas Eve, everyone, and goodbye.

(Last thing, I REALLY suck at goodbyes. Leaving my own blog by my own choice sucks. It’s like I am leaving a piece of me behind. Clearly, I have attachment issues.)

I still have more to say.

Agh, bye.

All because they do not wish to see anyone else suffer the way they do. [x]

(Source: imodair, via deadlynightmaressurroundme)

Everyone has six names.

1. your real name: Taylor

2. your detective name (favorite color and favorite animal): Grey Ferret

3. your soap opera name (middle name and street you live on): Ann 32nd

4. your star wars name (first three letters of last name, first two of middle name, first two of first, last three of last): Spranspngs

5. superhero name (color of your shirt, first item to your immediate left): White Pillow

6. goth name (black and one of your pets): Black Pixel

(Source: peacefulfrom1353, via deadlynightmaressurroundme)

Oh sweetness. Yeah, I cut tonight.

Oh sweetness. Yeah, I cut tonight.

Anonymous asked: tayyy (:

…yes? (:

hornyforniallhoran:

Reblog if you have ever:

Self harmed

Sufferd from Bulimia or Anorexia 

Sufferd from depression 

Then look in your ask - Wait a few minutes.. It will come 

(via deadlynightmaressurroundme)

afyasco:

7-tease:

-uhhleeseeuhh:

lolzpicx:

GO HOME KITTEN, YOU ARE DRUNK.

WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED

oh my god it’s like he started to hover away but his front half’s antigravity didn’t activate

baby

afyasco:

7-tease:

-uhhleeseeuhh:

lolzpicx:

GO HOME KITTEN, YOU ARE DRUNK.

WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED

oh my god it’s like he started to hover away but his front half’s antigravity didn’t activate

baby

(Source: imgfave, via deadlynightmaressurroundme)

diary0fthedamned:

welcometomymindhowmayihelpyou:

lovekelseyrae:

jennybean:

stephaniekilbury:

Cried when I read this.
“They told me the big black Lab’s name was Reggie, as I looked at him lying in his pen. The shelter was clean, no-kill, and the people really friendly. I’d only been in the area for six months, but everywhere I went in the small college town, people were welcoming and open. Everyone waves when you pass them on the street.
But something was still missing as I attempted to settle in to my new life here, and I thought a dog couldn’t hurt. Give me someone to talk to. And I had just seen Reggie’s advertisement on the local news. The shelter said they had received numerous calls right after, but they said the people who had come down to see him just didn’t look like “Lab people,” whatever that meant. They must’ve thought I did.But at first, I thought the shelter had misjudged me in giving me Reggie and his things, which consisted of a dog pad, bag of toys almost all of which were brand new tennis balls, his dishes and a sealed letter from his previous owner.See, Reggie and I didn’t really hit it off when we got home. We struggled for two weeks (which is how long the shelter told me to give him to adjust to his new home). Maybe it was the fact that I was trying to adjust, too.Maybe we were too much alike.I saw the sealed envelope. I had completely forgotten about that. “Okay, Reggie,” I said out loud, “let’s see if your previous owner has any advice.”____________ _________ _________ _________To Whomever Gets My Dog:Well, I can’t say that I’m happy you’re reading this, a letter I told the shelter could only be opened by Reggie’s new owner. I’m not even happy writing it. He knew something was different.So let me tell you about my Lab in the hopes that it will help you bond with him and he with you.First, he loves tennis balls. The more the merrier. Sometimes I think he’s part squirrel, the way he hoards them. He usually always has two in his mouth, and he tries to get a third in there. Hasn’t done it yet. Doesn’tmatter where you throw them, he’ll bound after them, so be careful. Don’t do it by any roads.Next, commands. Reggie knows the obvious ones —-“sit,” “stay,” “come,” “heel.”He knows hand signals, too: He knows “ball” and “food” and “bone” and “treat” like nobody’s business.Feeding schedule: twice a day, regular store-bought stuff; the shelter has the brand.He’s up on his shots. Be forewarned: Reggie hates the vet. Good luck getting him in the car. I don’t know how he knows when it’s time to go to the vet, but he knows.Finally, give him some time. It’s only been Reggie and me for his whole life. He’s gone everywhere with me, so please include him on your daily car rides if you can. He sits well in the backseat, and he doesn’t bark or complain. He just loves to be around people, and me most especially.And that’s why I need to share one more bit of info with you…His name’s not Reggie. He’s a smart dog, he’ll get used to it and will respond to it, of that I have no doubt. But I just couldn’t bear to give them his real name. But if someone is reading this … well it means that his new owner should know his real name. His real name is “Tank.” Because, that is what I drive.I told the shelter that they couldn’t make “Reggie” available for adoption until they received word from my company commander. You see, my parents are gone, I have no siblings, no one I could’ve left Tank with .. and it was my only real request of the Army upon my deployment to Iraq, that they make one phone call to the shelter … in the “event” … to tell them that Tank could be put up for adoption. Luckily, my CO is a dog-guy, too, and he knew where my platoon was headed. He said he’d do it personally. And if you’re reading this, then he made good on his word.Tank has been my family for the last six years, almost as long as the Army has been my family. And now I hope and pray that you make him part of your family, too, and that he will adjust and come to love you the same way heloved me.If I have to give up Tank to keep those terrible people from coming to the US I am glad to have done so. He is my example of service and of love. I hope I honored him by my service to my country and comrades.All right, that’s enough. I deploy this evening and have to drop this letter off at the shelter. Maybe I’ll peek in on him and see if he finally got that third tennis ball in his mouth.Good luck with Tank. Give him a good home, and give him an extra kiss goodnight - every night - from me.Thank you,Paul Mallory____________ _________ _________ _______I folded the letter and slipped it back in the envelope. Sure, I had heard of Paul Mallory, everyone in town knew him, even new people like me. Local kid, killed in Iraq a few months ago and posthumously earning the SilverStar when he gave his life to save three buddies. Flags had been at half-mast all summer.I leaned forward in my chair and rested my elbows on my knees, staring at the dog.“Hey, Tank,” I said quietly.The dog’s head whipped up, his ears cocked and his eyes bright.“C’mere boy.”He was instantly on his feet, his nails clicking on the hardwood floor. He sat in front of me, his head tilted, searching for the name he hadn’t heard in months. “Tank,” I whispered.His tail swished.I kept whispering his name, over and over, and each time, his ears lowered, his eyes softened, and his posture relaxed as a wave of contentment just seemed to flood him. I stroked his ears, rubbed his shoulders, buried myface into his scruff and hugged him.“It’s me now, Tank, just you and me. Your old pal gave you to me.” Tank reached up and licked my cheek.“So whatdaya say we play some ball?” His ears perked again.“Yeah? Ball? You like that? Ball?”Tank tore from my hands and disappeared into the next room. And when he came back, he had three tennis balls in his mouth.”

Dying. Crying. 

gave me wayyyy too many chills and goosebumps. love this story

this damn shit right here……holy fuck it gets to me

All the feels :’(

diary0fthedamned:

welcometomymindhowmayihelpyou:

lovekelseyrae:

jennybean:

stephaniekilbury:

Cried when I read this.

“They told me the big black Lab’s name was Reggie, as I looked at him lying in his pen. The shelter was clean, no-kill, and the people really friendly. I’d only been in the area for six months, but everywhere I went in the small college town, people were welcoming and open. Everyone waves when you pass them on the street.


But something was still missing as I attempted to settle in to my new life here, and I thought a dog couldn’t hurt. Give me someone to talk to. And I had just seen Reggie’s advertisement on the local news. The shelter said they had received numerous calls right after, but they said the people who had come down to see him just didn’t look like “Lab people,” whatever that meant. They must’ve thought I did.

But at first, I thought the shelter had misjudged me in giving me Reggie and his things, which consisted of a dog pad, bag of toys almost all of which were brand new tennis balls, his dishes and a sealed letter from his previous owner.

See, Reggie and I didn’t really hit it off when we got home. We struggled for two weeks (which is how long the shelter told me to give him to adjust to his new home). Maybe it was the fact that I was trying to adjust, too.
Maybe we were too much alike.

I saw the sealed envelope. I had completely forgotten about that. “Okay, Reggie,” I said out loud, “let’s see if your previous owner has any advice.”
____________ _________ _________ _________

To Whomever Gets My Dog:

Well, I can’t say that I’m happy you’re reading this, a letter I told the shelter could only be opened by Reggie’s new owner. I’m not even happy writing it. He knew something was different.

So let me tell you about my Lab in the hopes that it will help you bond with him and he with you.

First, he loves tennis balls. The more the merrier. Sometimes I think he’s part squirrel, the way he hoards them. He usually always has two in his mouth, and he tries to get a third in there. Hasn’t done it yet. Doesn’t
matter where you throw them, he’ll bound after them, so be careful. Don’t do it by any roads.

Next, commands. Reggie knows the obvious ones —-“sit,” “stay,” “come,” “heel.”

He knows hand signals, too: He knows “ball” and “food” and “bone” and “treat” like nobody’s business.

Feeding schedule: twice a day, regular store-bought stuff; the shelter has the brand.

He’s up on his shots. Be forewarned: Reggie hates the vet. Good luck getting him in the car. I don’t know how he knows when it’s time to go to the vet, but he knows.

Finally, give him some time. It’s only been Reggie and me for his whole life. He’s gone everywhere with me, so please include him on your daily car rides if you can. He sits well in the backseat, and he doesn’t bark or complain. He just loves to be around people, and me most especially.

And that’s why I need to share one more bit of info with you…His name’s not Reggie. He’s a smart dog, he’ll get used to it and will respond to it, of that I have no doubt. But I just couldn’t bear to give them his real name. But if someone is reading this … well it means that his new owner should know his real name. His real name is “Tank.” Because, that is what I drive.

I told the shelter that they couldn’t make “Reggie” available for adoption until they received word from my company commander. You see, my parents are gone, I have no siblings, no one I could’ve left Tank with .. and it was my only real request of the Army upon my deployment to Iraq, that they make one phone call to the shelter … in the “event” … to tell them that Tank could be put up for adoption. Luckily, my CO is a dog-guy, too, and he knew where my platoon was headed. He said he’d do it personally. And if you’re reading this, then he made good on his word.

Tank has been my family for the last six years, almost as long as the Army has been my family. And now I hope and pray that you make him part of your family, too, and that he will adjust and come to love you the same way he
loved me.

If I have to give up Tank to keep those terrible people from coming to the US I am glad to have done so. He is my example of service and of love. I hope I honored him by my service to my country and comrades.

All right, that’s enough. I deploy this evening and have to drop this letter off at the shelter. Maybe I’ll peek in on him and see if he finally got that third tennis ball in his mouth.

Good luck with Tank. Give him a good home, and give him an extra kiss goodnight - every night - from me.

Thank you,

Paul Mallory
____________ _________ _________ _______

I folded the letter and slipped it back in the envelope. Sure, I had heard of Paul Mallory, everyone in town knew him, even new people like me. Local kid, killed in Iraq a few months ago and posthumously earning the Silver
Star when he gave his life to save three buddies. Flags had been at half-mast all summer.

I leaned forward in my chair and rested my elbows on my knees, staring at the dog.

“Hey, Tank,” I said quietly.

The dog’s head whipped up, his ears cocked and his eyes bright.

“C’mere boy.”

He was instantly on his feet, his nails clicking on the hardwood floor. He sat in front of me, his head tilted, searching for the name he hadn’t heard in months. “Tank,” I whispered.

His tail swished.

I kept whispering his name, over and over, and each time, his ears lowered, his eyes softened, and his posture relaxed as a wave of contentment just seemed to flood him. I stroked his ears, rubbed his shoulders, buried my
face into his scruff and hugged him.

“It’s me now, Tank, just you and me. Your old pal gave you to me.” Tank reached up and licked my cheek.

“So whatdaya say we play some ball?” His ears perked again.

“Yeah? Ball? You like that? Ball?”

Tank tore from my hands and disappeared into the next room. And when he came back, he had three tennis balls in his mouth.”

Dying. Crying. 

gave me wayyyy too many chills and goosebumps. love this story

this damn shit right here……holy fuck it gets to me

All the feels :’(

(via deadlynightmaressurroundme)

lizetted:

gettingtomygoalweightby2012:

healthylivingforyou:

eveningfades:

The beauty of Eating Disorders.
I have been bulimic now for about 7 years, and this disease is killing me from the inside and on the outside. I’ve purged up blood before, but never as much as I experienced today. The amount of blood actually shocked me. I have almost no hair left, and the hair which I still have has thinned out. My teeth are all rotten. I can’t drink cold drinks. I can’t drink hot drinks. I can’t eat hard, crunchy things. My jaw will be getting surgery soon. My stomach hurts every time I attempt to keep food down. And not to mention my digestive system is completely fucked. 
So you want perfection? You want all the boys to want you? You want to be beautiful? You’re not going to get that. This is what you’ll get. You’re further and further away from perfection each second. No boy wants you because you always smell like puke, blood, and you actually fear even being close to anyone. You become worthless.Beautiful? No. You become an ugly, horrible monster. Scars, bruises. You can’t go on dates. Refuse to go out with friends. You isolate yourself from everything and everyone. Still not convinced? Do you still want this?I’m giving mine out for free. 

I needed to reblog this for my followers.

People, please lose weight the right way. This will only put you further from everything you want. You think you want to be thin, but you don’t. You want to be thin only because for: confidence, to feel good about yourself, to have guys wanting you, etc. But you can’t achieve that even when you are thin if you anorexic or bulimic because you’ll only suffer a worse self image of yourself than before. It’s not worth it. If you can put up with all the pain of not eating and puking, why can’t you just deal with eating right and exercising? You’ll still get your aim of being thin but you will have a fucking sexy body which is toned, friends you make from exercising together, etc and guys will be after you like bees to honey. So please, choose the right path!

To everyone who has ever even thought about putting your fingers down your throat. Think again. 

lizetted:

gettingtomygoalweightby2012:

healthylivingforyou:

eveningfades:

The beauty of Eating Disorders.

I have been bulimic now for about 7 years, and this disease is killing me from the inside and on the outside. I’ve purged up blood before, but never as much as I experienced today. The amount of blood actually shocked me. I have almost no hair left, and the hair which I still have has thinned out. My teeth are all rotten. I can’t drink cold drinks. I can’t drink hot drinks. I can’t eat hard, crunchy things. My jaw will be getting surgery soon. My stomach hurts every time I attempt to keep food down. And not to mention my digestive system is completely fucked. 

So you want perfection? You want all the boys to want you? You want to be beautiful? 

You’re not going to get that. This is what you’ll get.
You’re further and further away from perfection each second.
No boy wants you because you always smell like puke, blood, and you actually fear even being close to anyone. You become worthless.
Beautiful? No. You become an ugly, horrible monster. Scars, bruises. You can’t go on dates. Refuse to go out with friends. You isolate yourself from everything and everyone.

Still not convinced? Do you still want this?
I’m giving mine out for free. 

I needed to reblog this for my followers.

People, please lose weight the right way. This will only put you further from everything you want. You think you want to be thin, but you don’t. You want to be thin only because for: confidence, to feel good about yourself, to have guys wanting you, etc. But you can’t achieve that even when you are thin if you anorexic or bulimic because you’ll only suffer a worse self image of yourself than before. It’s not worth it. If you can put up with all the pain of not eating and puking, why can’t you just deal with eating right and exercising? You’ll still get your aim of being thin but you will have a fucking sexy body which is toned, friends you make from exercising together, etc and guys will be after you like bees to honey. So please, choose the right path!

To everyone who has ever even thought about putting your fingers down your throat. Think again. 

(Source: eveningfades-me, via deadlynightmaressurroundme)

My birthday was yesterday.

New ferret <3

I’m sixteen, wow.

Well, I made it.

Anonymous asked: I care, and I love you. When shit's overwhelming...you have a room at my place.

<3

Really, really, really low right now.

Nobody cares, though.

Nobody.

Post 681.

Happy Thanksgiving, guys.

I had a crap day.

I’ve been babysitting since 11:30am and won’t go home until tomorrow AM.

I am so stressed out. I want to scream and cry and cut.

I wish I could hang GIFS on my walls.